After taking a picture with the cake, Sehun just stood there, while the rest of the people and his hyung-deul are readying to leave. They bowed to their sunbaenims, members slowly walking out of the building. But Sehun just stood there, waiting for someone to guide him, to tell him what to do next. His mind is a mess at the mean time. He’s having anxiety attack. No one, but Chanyeol, came back looking for him.
“Sehun’ah... What are you still doing here? Everybody’s outside already.” Chanyeol approached Sehun.
Sehun just looked at his hyung and silently let out a, “Huh?”
Chanyeol slowly wrapped his arms around the maknae’s waist and pulled him closer to his side as they walked out of the building. “Come on.”
“Yeollie-hyung...” Sehun whispered, eyes darting everywhere as if not knowing what to look at.
“It’s okay Sehun-ah... I got you. Hyung got you.” Chanyeol said.
When they were outside the building, their manager was waiting for them. “Come on guys, the others already went ahead at the restaurant.”
“Hyung, who’s in the van?” Chanyeol asked their manager, not letting go of Sehun.
“Baekhyun and Kyungsoo decided to wait for you guys.”
The door of the van opened as they near it, “Hey guys come on, Junnie-hyung called and told me that they are already at the restaurant.” Baekhyun started as he and Kyungsoo saw their manager and Sehun in Chanyeol’s arms.
The three went in the van. Before the manager started the van, “I want to go back to the dorm.” Sehun suddenly said looking down.
The four turned to looked at him.
“Okay. To the dorm it is.” Chanyeol said, rubbing Sehun’s arms. They were sitting at the back. He looked at their manager and said, “Hyung, please. You can drop us first at the dorm, before you join the others.”
“Yes hyung, you can drop us first at the dorm, you can join the others after. We’ll take care of Sehunnie, don’t worry.” Kyungsoo said, seeing the condition of their maknae, he decided to not join the others.
“I’ll go with them too, hyung.” Baekhyun said, looking back at their youngest and seeing him already asleep with his head tucked between Chanyeol’s right shoulder and neck.
“Are you sure? Ok, contact the others and tell them your decision.” The manager went back to start to van and make their way to the dorm.
“Uhm, actually hyung, it is better if you tell them that we decided to stay with Sehunnie because he’s not feeling well. If we tell them now, I’m sure they will make a fuss and we don’t want to ruin their fun now.” Baekhyun told their manager, not wanting the others to worry for their maknae.
“Ok. Make sure to calm Sehunnie down. Chanyeol, I’ll leave you to that. Kyungsoo, you prepare your dinner, okay? And Baekhyun, make sure to be lively. Don’t worry Sehun with you worrying about him.” Their manager instructed, knowing the routine for nine months.
“I know that already hyung,” Chanyeol replied.
“Yes, hyung, I’ll cook something Sehun likes.” Kyungsoo said, while listing the dishes in his phone.
“I’m always lively, hyung.” Baekhyun smiled at their manager.
“Hey guys! We brought something!” Jongdae shouted after slamming the dorm’s door open.
“Whoah, that’s many. But we already ate.” Kyungsoo said helping Jongdae put the take outs on the dinner table.
“What’s with the bags?” Baekhyun asked as he noticed Yixing, Tao, Jongdae and Minseok carrying bags.
“We went first at our dorm and got some extra clothes coz-“Yixing was cut off by Jongdae shouting “SLEEPOVER!!! We are going to sleep here!” Jongdae bounced from the kitchen and then landing next to Junmyeon on the sofa. Jongin was sitting on the other side of the sofa with Tao leaning on him. Yixing settled beside Baekhyun on the adjacent sofa.
“So, where are Chanyeol and Sehunnie?” Minseok asked as he sat on the other side of Baekhyun, looking for the two giants.
As Kyungsoo walked to the living room, there was enough silence to hear the muffled sobs coming from the last room on the dark hallway of the dorm.
“Chanyeol is calming Sehunnie down now.” Baekhyun said, remembering the time their maknae woke up, and then fed by Kyungsoo while Baekhyun keep chatting at the table, Chanyeol always beside the maknae. And then he slowly stood up, tugging Chanyeol’s arm while muttering the word which told them that their maknae’s condition is serious.
“What happened? Did something happen at the SMA?” Junmyeon asked, worry evidence in his eyes. He’s been worried since their manager told them that four of his members will go straight back at the dorm and that their youngest is not feeling well.
“Yeah, this is so sudden, he’s been fine since the awarding. Does he have a cold?” Jongdae wondered about their maknae’s condition.
“He’s been laughing and chatting with me at our table then, maybe he’s just tired after our performance, since he’s been busy too this days with tapings.” Minseok said.
“Sehunnie...” Kyungsoo said, looking at Baekhyun and then looking at their leader, the other members knows that what Kyungsoo will say is going to be serious, “...Sehunnie... called Chanyeol...Appa...”
“What...” Junmyeon muttered eyes wide. Looking down, he seems to be thinking of what made Sehun call Chanyeol that word.
“Chanyeol is Sehun’s ‘a-” Yixing was cut off again by Jongdae “Sehun called Chanyeol ‘appa’? What’s wrong with that?” Jongdae asked, looking at everyone. Tao looked confused, Yixing as well, Minseok looks down, Baekhyun was looking at Jongin, and the kid is frowning.
“Why would he call Chanyeol-hyung ‘appa’?” Jongin asked Kyungsoo, not for the reason that it is normal for Sehun to refer to someone as family member, but for the reason of what started it to cause Sehun call Chanyeol ‘appa’.
Instead of Kyungsoo, it was Baekhyun who answered Jongin. “Sehunnie... has been crying after Chanyeol locked them in his room. I heard him. Sehunnie... Hunnie’s feeling alone lately. And he’s afraid that someone will leave again. That someone will leave HIM again.” Baekhyun looked at Tao and Jongin.
“Tao... I think it’s not healthy anymore to not interact with Sehun in public.” It’s their leader now who spoke. “I know it’s for Sehun’s protection against the bashers who sees your closeness improper. But think of Sehun too. I know Sehun agreed with this, but please tone down your avoidance.” Junmyeon looked at Tao and Jongin. “Tao, you know what I mean, right? And you two are still friends.”
The others just looked at their leader. Jongdae spoke up. “So, Sehun calling Chanyeol ‘appa’ indicates that he feels neglected?” he asked, looking at the K members.
“No.” Jongin said. “It’s a sign of his anxiety attack. He’s been having that after...” Jongin let out a sigh. “After Kris-hyung left. It worsens after Luhan-hyung informed us that he’s planning to leave.”
“What? Since Kris left?” Minseok asked. The M members looked at the K members. “But we never ...notice.”
“Sehun seeks Chanyeol’s care when his attack suddenly strikes. He will want to go back here and locked in his room and cries his worries to Chanyeol. He started calling Chanyeol ‘appa’ on the third day that he has his attack after Kris-hyung left. And he’s blaming himself of why Kris-hyung and Luhan-hyung decided to leave.” Kyungsoo explained.
“Tao, let the fans think what they want to think. Sehun’s been hurting for days, I see it in his eyes. And he’s starting to blame himself because fans started to attack you because of how close Sehun is to you. That you want to lessen your interaction with him because of that issue. Tao, just let the fans think whatever they want, don’t show Sehun that it affects you. By avoiding each other in public means you’re affected Tao, and that does not come good to Sehun’s eyes.” Baekhyun looked at Tao. “We all know that Sehun isn’t afraid of any insects or anything. But we know how fragile he is when it comes to abandonment issues. Actually, you two should have not decided to less your interactions in public in the first place.”
“And hang out with him again. He’s been lonely since you started to hang out with your other friends.” Chanyeol suddenly appeared at the start of the hallway.
“Chanyeol-ah! How’s Sehun?” Junmyeon asked standing and grabbing Chanyeol’s arm.
“He’s asleep now hyung. He’s hugging his pinku pinku now. He will just need reassurance now from Tao.” Chanyeol looked at Tao. “That your friendship still stands”.
“I’m sorry. I should have been aware that this will happen. I just wanted to help. I just want the fans to get off the back of Sehun. Tao and I been talking a lot this times. I should have known that Sehunnie will feel this way.” Jongin looked down feeling guilty since he knows how Sehun will be if avoided. “I should have known.”
“Yes, you mean well Jongin, but I think that added to Sehun’s insecurities.” Kyungsoo commented.
“I’m sorry.” Tao looked down. “I’m sorry I didn’t know.” Tao stood up, looking at Chanyeol if he may go and talk to Sehun.
“It’s ok, Tao, you’re not aware. Sehun doesn’t want to tell his problems. It’s just we’re in the same dorm, that’s why K members are aware of it. If Sehun wants to, it will just be Chanyeol who will know of his anxiety.” Baekhyun smiled at him. “And Jongin, yes, you should have known. But, it happened already.” Baekhyun smiled at Jongin.
“Ok, Tao go now. Talk to Sehun. If you two started to hang out together, maybe we could have someone with the two of you.” Their leader smiled at Tao.
“Yes, that would be fine.” Tao said, itching to go to Sehun.
“Tomorrow, let’s stay at the practice room and hang out there.” Junmyeon suggested.
“Hang out there? Hyung we will go practice tomorrow not play around.” Jongdae reminded their leader.
“We could play a game after practicing.” Minseok suggested.
“Let’s smother Sehun with our love.” Yixing said.
“Hahaha, Yixing-hyung, you’re finally able to finish your sentence!” Jongdae laughed.
“Ok, settle down now guys.” Junmyeon said before Yixing can talk back to Jongdae. (And Yixing being cut off again, and worse, wasn’t able to let out a single word before being cut off again). “Tao, you go and talk to Sehun now. After that, Jongin, you go and cuddle Sehun ok?” Junmyeon turned to the other maknaes.
“What? Why would Jongin cuddle Sehun? That should be me. Sehun and I are the ones having problems.” Tao complained.
“Tao, Jongin needs to reassure Sehun too. And Jongin needs reassurance too that Sehun and he are ok.” Chanyeol explained to the frowning Tao. “Even if it’s you and Sehun having problems, you know where Jongin stands in Sehun’s life and what he did these days affects Sehun too.”
“We know I am the boyfriend, Tao, and I too still need reassurance that he won’t ignore me in the morning. Since you’ve been talking to me a lot in the awarding programs.” Jongin smirked, irking Tao.
“Fine. Since you’re the boyfriend of Sehun. I will be fine with that.” Tao said, still frowning. He expects that he could cuddle with Sehun after they talk. Not leaving the room and letting Jongin cuddle Sehun. Sehun is still his bestfriend.
“Go, now Tao. Sehun has calmed down enough that he will wake up any minute now.” Chanyeol pushed Tao towards the direction of the room where Sehun is.
“Make it quick!” Jongin yelled after him.
“Hun-ah...” Tao lie down on the bed back hugging Sehun.
Sehun opened his eyes. He has been awake since someone opened the door to his room. He hold Tao’s arm around him, making it tighter. “Taozi... Tao...” Sehun whispered.
Tao buried his nose in Sehun’s nape. “Hunnie... Sorry.” Tao whispered against Sehun’s nape.
Sehun turned in Tao’s embrace and buried his nose against Tao’s chest, inhaling his scent. “Are we hanging out again?”
“Yeah. Sorry. Love you, Hunnie.” Tao kissed Sehun’s forehead. “Love you.”
Sehun closed his eyes. He’s keeping sniffing Tao’s neck. “Love you too, Taozi.” Sehun muttered.
Tao suddenly laughed and making Sehun looked at him in the eyes. “But we can’t hang out this time. Someone’s waiting for his turn.” Tao is pinching Sehun’s cheek softly. Sehun giggled. His beautiful eye smile. “Yeah, that’s right.” He said happily.
“Hm...But let’s stay like this for a while. Junnie-hyung said Jongin needs to cuddle you to sleep. We’ll see each other again tomorrow.” Tao explained. At first he hesitates to tell Sehun and let his best friend sleep in his arms.
“I know. Kkamjong is a baby. I know he will worry once he found out that I had an attack.” Sehun said.
“Ah, about that... Sehunnie, I’m sorry I didn’t notice, or we from M unit didn’t even think about the effects of… to everyone.”
“It’s okay. I just don’t want to worry you guys that’s why I didn’t want them to tell you anything about it.” Sehun said.
“But we know now.” Tao hugged Sehun tightly.
“Go now.” Sehun suddenly said.
“What?” Tao looked at him dumbfounded.
Sehun smiled at him with his eye smile and said, “I want to sleep now, I’m tired. Jongin needs to cuddle me now.” Sehun said closing his eyes.
“Aish! Don’t say things like that. Your little boyfriend has already stolen time that you were supposed to spend with your best friend.” Tao pouted.
“Ok, ok. Go now. Tell Jongin to cuddle me now.” Sehun laughed.
“Sehunnie~” Tao whined.
“Love you, Zitao.” Sehun hugged his best friend.
“Love you too, Hunnie-ah.” Tao smiled and got off the bed and walking out of the room, after giving Sehun a flying kiss.
“Yah! Sehun asks for you.” Tao said, obviously sulking. He lie down on the sofa, adjacent with one Junmyeon was lying down.
“Don’t worry Tao, you’ll get yourself a boyfriend someday. Maybe an old man.” Jongin happily said. He’s prancing on the way to Sehun’s room.
The other members are already asleep. Yixing and Minseok taking the floor of the living room, and obviously, Tao and Jongdae took up the sofas.
Tao wish to cuddle with Sehun that night. But what can he do, Jongin was being a baby. And Sehun is a baby too. And Tao knows that he’s being a baby by wanting his bestfriend by his side.
Being a maknae comes tantrums, insecurities, and sulking.
Junmyeon thinks with his eyes closed, but I am not an old man. That brat Jongin. Sigh, don’t worry Taozi, I’ll make my move someday.